Warmahordes - On board and Overboard

Making no apologies for my lack of posting over the past 13 months, I'm back to tell you about how to go utterly overboard on a whim.

It's the classic story: 

Boy plays 40k 5th edition. 
40k releases 6th edition. 
Boy tries a new game system. 

     It's not that I have a huge issue with rules changes, nor am I completely incapable of using my existing models to play well established games. My real issue with Warhammer 40k comes from the fact that I can spend 2 weeks painting a full unit, only to have them wiped out on turn 3. Thirty whole figures lovingly pigmented in my very minimal available free time, made meaningless by a round of shooting from a single tank. If I had been in on the ground floor of the game, in a "tale of # gamers" scenario, or perhaps having actually been working on an army since 3rd edition some 12 years ago, my feelings might be different. Sadly, in order to play competitively, that means a lot of painting needs to be done before I can even show up to the table.

     Certainly I could remedy this by playing a force such as Grey Knights, where "5 figures and a vehicle, repeat thrice over" is a playable army. Unfortunately some part of me keeps shying away from power armor armies, and wanting to play the alien menace. In this case, that's tyranids and space orks, both of which are only valid options if one chooses to paint and field loads and loads of figures. I'm certain that 6th edition will do nothing to alter the sheer number of figures required to be effective in game, and my opponent, with his 3 vehicles and 15 terminators will have no interest in playing lower points games where I can actually field painted armies.

      And thus, wanderlust sets in. I decided, upon trading in a fair amount of collectable card gaming materials, that I'd dip my toe into Hordes. I understand that with as few as 9 figures, one can have a pretty reasonable force with which to play a very tactical game in under an hour.

Sounds pretty good, right?

Of course, it's self delusion. There's no way I want to start buying armies one figure at a time at full MSRP. I'd want, much like I'd want with Warhammer 40k, to be able to field any available combination of units at any time just as fast as  my brush can ready them.

So, how far overboard am I? 

     Blame www.bartertown.com for making it so very easy to locate other gamers who want to swap off their goods. They list what they've got, and what they want (other games, money, whatever you've got), and you make the deal. There's no fee to list, and no cut taken by bartertown. If you end up making a cash deal, chances are that the buyer will be responsible for shipping, and the seller will end up getting some of their gains eaten by paypal fees. Aside from that, it's a much less treacherous environment in which to do business than eBay.

     There's a fairly good turnover of players who are leaving some game to start another, and who are liquidating their collections at 50% off retail. Some of the forces are "pro-painted". Some come with fancy storage bags. Some are one of damned near every model for a faction up to a certain point in time.

     Let's just say I have a very good chance of being able to field anything at all on the standard allocation list for Trollbloods and Khador... Any caster.

     And not only that, any unit up to but not including war wagons and colossal units. That's right... I'm in way over my head.

     Once you've done something crazy like I have, and your packages start rolling in one after another, with scores of figures you must paint and learn how to use, where does one begin? I've had a few ideas on the subject:

Plan 0) Paint what looks cool. 

This was my first plan, and while I did get a couple of figures completed
-Grissel Bloodsong
-Fell Caller Solo
and a few figures started
-Winter Troll
-Pyre Troll
-5x Man O War Demolishers

I can't boast that it's anywhere near a playable force no matter how nice they look.

Status: Rejected - Too random

Plan 1) Paint what would be in a basic battlebox. 

For the trolls, that would be:
-Madrak Ironhide (pMadrak)
2x Troll Impalers
1x Troll Axer

For Khador, that would be:
-Sorcha
-Juggernaut Warjack
-Destroyer Warjack

     That would mean 7 figures to make a playable game, and then adding on afterwards. My ignorance about the game hampers me when I go to choose figure #8. That makes this plan a good stepping stone, but not a great overall plan. I've got mountains of figures to pigment.

Status: Accepted
Caveat: Limited use, will fail after roster fills out.

Plan 2) Pick a Netlist, any Netlist 

     Allowing some internet general to dictate my painting is a way to get a war host that has a playable composition. Unfortunately, this leaves me with a question. After all my hard work and painting, will I have a list that a rookie player can handle, or a bunch of figures that it takes a rocket surgeon to pilot to victory? Some amount of guess work can be done on this account, but I'd hate to pour my attention into a list that is too complicated to use.

I've done my best to read up on all the Khador and Trollblood units over at http://battlecollege.wikispaces.com/ . It has been an invaluable tool for getting to grips with how some of the factions handle caster/unit synergies, but I'm still not ready to trust myself to a tournament list that wrecks house if there's a chance that it's exploiting some mechanism or subtlety that I cant grasp.

Status: Rejected until further in game experience can be had.

Plan 3) Going by the book. 

     When the Warmachine game started out, there was one book. Just one.
In that book there were some basic forcelists. Since that time, the game has added army books, got upgraded to Warmachine Prime, had Hordes added, and is now in Mk 2 editions with additional books like Wrath and Domination and Colossals (Oh My!).

     My point, if there is one, is that once upon a time, there was one book. Each faction had 3 casters, some Jacks of beasts, a couple of unit types, and some solos. Nothing too crazy at all.

     The painting schedule for this plan would be:
1x each warcasters/warlock
1x each beast/jack
1x max unit of each type
1x each solo.

     Sure, it's a lot of painting at least 6 individual leaders, probably about 8 beasts/jacks. Some 50 figures for troops and a half dozen solos... When it's all said and done, I'll be looking at 70 painted figures. It sounds like a lot, but really, that's nothing compared to the number of Orks and Grots I'd have to paint to make max units in 40k.

     The real beauty in this plan, is that it's the same one that the original players had. Maybe they didn't sit down and write a couple thousand words about it, but when you can only get your hands on those basic units and starting casters, it's the plan you go with because no other plan is available.

     This can be extended by following the book/unit release schedule that the publisher followed. With a little research, I can figure out when each figure/book was released, and make a chronological list of what units get painted in what order. This would be the same order that players were learning to use the units in, and should be a good roadmap to follow.

Status: Strong Possibility.


     If I can get a painting schedule sorted out, and I know what I'm working on currently, and next, then it becomes a lot easier to learn about one unit at a time as I'm getting it table ready, instead of trying to sort out 3 dozen different kinds of troops per faction in a single go.


If I can keep my wits about me, I'll take up posting in-progress photos here, mostly for my own benefit, but also for those who may have stumbled their way in. Here's to hoping my text-out-loud ramblings make some sense.

~Pyg~

Hamilton's Dilemma : Fantasy Skirmish for under Ten Bucks

Brother, can you spare a dime?

     No matter who you are, or what game you play, there comes a time when you're running low on resources. Everyone has been short of time, opponents, interest, space, and as is the fashion today, cash.

     Being the fiscal protagonists of our modern age, chances are that Ten Dollars (or 7 Euros, or 9.33 AUS, or 807 Yen) could pay for lunch on any given weekday. Some might argue that $10 is a lot to pay for lunch, and that I'm paying too much. I will kindly agree with that person, and encourage them to take me to lunch sometime. Meanwhile, I propose this:

"For $10 or less, I can find you a game worth playing."

     Inexpensive gaming is much easier than it was 2 decades ago thanks to small press, free rulesets, abandoned games, and a much more connected community of wargamers, cardgamers, role players, board gamers and so forth. In fact, this entire article written by myself in 1991 would have consisted of taking graph paper from the classroom, the dice from Monopoly, and making up a cheap-as-free dungeon crawl. Seeing as we're one step away from having Jet-Cars in our floating garages, let's get underway.

     Taking a cue from prominent game manufacturers such as Fantasy Flight Games, Games Workshop, or Alderac Entertainment Group, I want to make sure the game I'm playing has toys in it. Punching out chits or assembling and painting figures can be greatly entertaining by itself. The rules may be horrible, but good toys can save a game from disgrace.

Saving on Dimensions Saves on Cost!

     I'll direct your attention to One Monk Miniatures which is an outstanding source of paper print/cut/fold miniatures. If you peruse the left hand column of their site, you'll find some pretty impressive Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Post-Apoc, and miscellaneous figures. These figures are free to print, and with minimal effort on your part, a legion of flat inch tall men and beasts can be yours to command. I'm going to choose some sets from the Warbands page. Some Goblins as well as the Bandits and Brigands sets.

     I can already hear the whistles blowing and klaxons howling.

"You said we'd be able to do this for under ten bucks! Color printers cost WAY more than a tenner!"

     You may well already have a color printer that you can use at little or no cost. Inkjet printers have become a fairly common household item. If you ask around your school, workplace, or friends and family members, you may already have access to a color laser printer. The actual cost of these options varies based on how badly you're being ripped off for supplies, so even those with a home printer can look elsewhere.

     Print shops offer convenience and higher quality results than what most folks can get on their own. Many will allow you to walk in with a link to a pdf online, download it, and print that pdf on their very expensive high-quality color printer. They may even offer a higher grade of paper or cardstock, so be sure to ask about your options.

The options for retail color printing near me are:
- Staples
- Office Depot
- Catskill Art and Office Supply

Single Color Copy

Store	Plain	Cardstock	Gloss Stock
Staples	59¢	98¢	$1.09
Office Depot	59¢	66¢	74¢
Catskill A&O	$1.95	$2.05	$2.25

     It's pretty clear to me that the most "bang for the buck" will be to get Office Depot to print out a Goblin Warband, as well as one each of the Bandits and Brigands. I'll even recommend the heavier weight cardstock (67 lb). That's about $2.25 of our ten dollars gone after we account for tax.

~Support Your Local Whatever~
      I included a local print shop in the above chart because they deserve a chance to earn my custom. If the goal of this article was to promote good citizenship and support local business, you could bet your last Community Chest card that I'd tell you to spend 6 dollars at the non-corporate store. For the purposes of frugality, I have to opt for the lowest price. The prices shown above have most assuredly changed since I wrote this article, so do yourself a favor and call a few print shops, including at least one locally owned one.

Billy! Stop licking that paste!

     By your own hand, or that of a convenient printing service, you've managed to print up several sheets of paper pawns. It's time to cut them out.

"But! Scissors and knives aren't free! You can't expect us to have those!"

        I assume most people have scissors in the same way they have a table and chairs. I like to use a pair of really small scissors to cut out paper flats, but a quick online search reveals that they can cost from $6 to well over $10, and I can't do much if I blow the budget on diminutive cutlery. I recommend a hobby knife, commonly referred to as an "X-acto knife" (due to successful marketing of that brand). These are available for a fairly low cost. I found a Stanley brand one for about $3.00 online and in a local store. This is well worth the price, as you'll be able to use it many other craft projects later on.

     You may be tempted by some expertly packaged and rebranded hobby knives. Unless that packaging is useful to you in some way, rest assured that the handle you buy for $3 and the one you buy for $7 take the exact same replacement blades. It is easy to over pay for simple tools because they have a fancy name, so be vigilant and buy the tool that works, not the shiny one.

     Place your printed paper figures on a sheet of cardboard and carefully use the knife to cut around the edges of the figure. Use cardboard to protect the surface you're cutting on. If you don't have any scrap cardboard available, it is free for the asking from most stores.

Adhesion is nine tenths of the law.

Now it's time to get those figures stuck together. Glue sticks, PVA "White/Elmer's" Glue, rubber cement.... These are all fine options, but I like to make my figures waterproof, and that's why I use Mod Podge. Available at fine fabric and craft stores everywhere, Mod Podge dries to a glossy but flexible shine, and not only adheres paper miniatures, but can be used to coat them as well. I can get an 8 ounce bottle of this stuff for $3.50 . Spoil yourself a little and spend 75 cents on a cheap brush. When I say cheap, I mean one without a size number, with bristles made of black nylon that don't form a point. Go on, you deserve it.

Brush some paint on the unprinted side of your goblin/brigand/bandit, then fold it in half and leave it to dry while you move onto the next one. You have at least 38 figures to do, so by the time number 38 is done, the very first one should be ready for a gloss coat.

Just brush a little more mod podge over one face of the figure and set it aside. This will give the figure a bit of a sheen, and prevent it from being destroyed by someone's careless beverage spillage. Repeat for all 38 figures, then flip them over and gloss the backs in the same way.

When this is all done, Take your remaining 50 cents and have it changed into pennies. I always love it when an object costs more than the money it takes to buy it, and miniatures bases are a constant source of amusement in this way. Rather than spend money on 25mm round bases, just stick your little paper figures to the pennies directly with more mod podge. You can probably even scrounge a few pennies for free here or there by being alert in parking lots, on sidewalks, and in convenience stores. Some folks swear by steel washers from the hardware store as being fantastic bases, and I'll agree, but in this case you'll never find a more ready metal disk than old Abraham Lincoln.


So, you've managed to make a force of humans, and a force of goblins... and we have 12 cents left in the budget. There aren't too many rulesets to be had for that price, but there are a few available for free! In this particular case, my eyes have been set on Mordheim from Games Workshop.

"But the Mordheim boxed set cost $55 brand new!"

Yes, and if this were 10 years ago you'd have a valid point. Since those heady days of GW releasing a new Specialist game every year, times have changed. Now the very same game you'd have paid full price for is available as a series of PDF downloads free of charge for your use. I'll include a link, but you'll probably be asked to divulge your country of origin in an intervening screen. For the record, I told the site I was from the United States, and it let me right through to the files.

Download the Mordheim Rules Here!


     I won't spell out the rules for you here, but I will tell you this. If you use the Brigands and Bandits as any of the 4 human mercenary warbands, and the goblins as the proxies for a skaven warband, you can get several nights entertainment out of the game. Just grab some of that cardboard we talked about earlier, and use your craft knife to slice it into the shape of some buildings. Think of an old west movie set. Having the fronts of a few buildings, along with some balconies and the occasional stack of barrels for cover will give you enough terrain to play in.


If you find it all a bit confusing, take a gander at http://www.mordheimer.com which is a fantastic site for learning more about the game.


So, There you have it, a few dozen figures, a ruleset, and 12 cents left over.

What have we learned?

• Paper Miniatures are generously on offer, and can be printed inexpensively.
• A little bit of arts and crafts goes a long way toward making presentable game pieces
• Abandoned rulesets are still fun
• Proxying goblins for rat men is perfectly reasonable

That's it for this, the very first go-round of Hamilton's Dilemma.
Stay tuned for more in the days and weeks to come.

Pygmaelion

Trying out a different player

In an effort to keep with my own arbitrary standards of Schmexcellence, I've decided that I need to start using an embedded music player that shows multiple tracks.

Since I'm freeloading off Blogspot, I'd love to be able to embed here. I've shown in the first post that I can get ~some~ kind of player working, but I'd like to replace it because it doesn't show the track that you're on, much less the one you're going to hear next.

The one below is XSPF player, and it doesn't seem to enjoy being here. I've beaten it up 7 ways from sunday, and I can get it to say "loading playlist" all over the place, but it never plays anything. Anyone have a clue as to what I'm doing wrong? Turns out I was embedding waaaay too many parameters. Finally settled on xspf_player-0.2.3.

A view of the source code on this page will show that I'm calling the player directly from google sites, and the playlist must be called with a thrice-conjugated auth code which can be gotten by downloading the playlist.xspf file, then right clicking it in firefox downloads  and 'copy download link". This gets me a URL with all manner of auth info on it that the XSPF player can understand.







Why do I want these features anyway? because:

Episode X.1: Intro - 3 mins
Episode X.2: Opening Rant - 5 mins
Episode X.3: Tet recommends GURPS - 6 mins
Episode X.4: A loud discussion about Star Wars ensues - 10 mins
Episode X.5: Five minutes of heavy breathing -5mins

Is better than:

Episode X - 29 minutes that you'll shut off once we hit the starwars segment

I realize that for making playlists on media devices, that's a bit of a bitch, but with inline players on sites, you can skip a segment you particularly don't care about.

Also, not every segment needs to be completed at the same time
so an entire episode might be waiting for a week to be completed, but at least there's SOMETHING there in the meanwhile.

I like bite sized conversations that begin and end in a podcast, with the option to skip over topics that don't interest me. I suspect other folks do as well

Episode 0 - Pips off the Port Side!

Welcome to Episode Zero: Where we try to get our sea legs with recording, writing, editing, and making pleasant noises come out of our heads.

For individual Segments:
SLAMcevich's Intro!
TwistedNumbers Lament!